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Name: Eric Kam-Chuan
Country: United States
State: California
Birthday: 9/2/1987
Gender: Male
Interests: Wushu (kung fu), computer games, piano, music, music writing, poetry, chinese stuff, chinese music, chatting, hanging out with friends...
o yea and eating healthy heh
Expertise: eat and sleep
Occupation: Student
Message: message meEmail: email me
AIM:  supakongfudofu
Member Since:
2/23/2003
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| lol they weren't kidding when they said it would be hot this weekend...
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| damn, the economy is really hitting hard to home man...
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| what is it about being the underdog that sucks so badly? what do these underdogs do about their situation?
i think everyone has probably felt what it's like to be an underdog within a group. it's definitely not a good feeling because sometimes you feel patronized by others in the group.
so i think it's pretty accepted that people will tend to like stuff that they are naturally better at. oftentimes being the underdog is connected to the fact that you are participating in a group that focuses on doing something that you aren't naturally talented at. a first easy example would be with only one variable. if you are in a group that plays some sort of game and you naturally suck, then you have the potential to become an underdog in the group. this is especially true if this is the focus of the group, like if during the group's free time they talk about the game.
a less obvious implication is when two variables come into play: for example, being good at something and socializing. perhaps in badminton for example, even if you are a person that is awesome that playing badmin, but you don't really socialize well and everyone else playing is playing more to socialize with each other than to play well, then you have the potential to become an underdog in the social arena. in this situation, even a good player of badmin will become the underdog because other people value socializing more than skill in the sport.
the end result is oftentimes the underdog will migrate or at least tend to reach out to different groups in which they are either higher in social rank or perhaps even the best among the group. nobody would argue against the fact that on a basic level the said badminton player would feel more comfortable to be hanging out with other hardcore badminton players.
While this might be a really basic conclusion, that people tend towards groups of people that they aren't the underdog, it might be able to explain why some friends in a group might be more absent than the others in the group. they oftentimes might feel that everyone is superior to them, and so they leave to find another realm where their talents are put to best use.
this social migration of underdogs within one group to another really is nothing but the reallocation of people to groups that they feel the most comfortable in. perhaps it's also a way that people with similar skills end up together. perhaps the feeling of not belonging is the fact that you are lower on the social spectrum within that group, and as a result you will find a group in which your natural talents are respected.
it seems simple, but think about your own groups that you hang out with. do you feel like the underdog, and how happy do you feel about your life? maybe you're just not in your element.
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| i guess i'll write today because i feel particularly discouraged.
i feel like my mandarin, while improving, is really hitting a wall. after spending so many years learning it, i really don't know how to improve. what makes me feel worse is that every mandarin speaker i try to speak to doesn't like to talk mandarin with me. after spending so much time trying to learn, and still getting the same effect, sometimes i feel really hopeless. i often feel like when they don't want to speak chinese to me, it's like them saying, give up, it's impossible. once, someone i knew even said it to me to my face, that it's impossible that my chinese will ever be good. words like these really really hurt, but on the other hand, when someone speaks mandarin to me i feel so happy. it's like the best feeling in my life.
i don't want people to tell me my mandarin is good either, of course. i know it's far from that. but it's the sheer unwillingless to help of other people that makes me feel so hopeless, because language is after all something that is best learned with other people. i think perhaps i'm just too needy, because i've so much to learn, the task seems impossible.
so at this point, i really don't know what to do. alot of people don't understand why i want to learn chinese so badly. hell, my dad even told me it doesn't matter, that his chinese is getting worse. my mom seems to discourage me from learning mandarin all the time.
i think at this point, the library of words i know is ok, however i really don't know how to use alot of it in a natural way, because i don't have anyone pointing out how to use words in a native manner. if i wanted to, i can probably express myself, but i will be saying it definitely in a way no native speaker would ever use.
so i'll keep trying hard, but without someone to guide me on what is natural sounding and what sounds awkward, i don't know if i can ever achieve my dream.
lol fucking xanga doesn't let me type chinese. oh well.
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